An Open Letter to the Makers of “Quarantine”
October 14, 2008
To Whom It May Concern:
What will it take to convince you that I have been reached by your ad campaign and know that you have a film that came out this weekend? I have seen banner ads on practically every website I visit, all my social networking sites, the billboards on sunset and everywhere else, my radio and, i believe, the bottom of some friends’ hotmail emails. I don’t even really watch commercials because I have a DVR, but you have saturated the shows i watch with ads to such an extent that the few times in recent memory that i’ve left the room or taken a call or started talking to the person sitting next to me when a show went to commercial, your ad has always been the first thing to come up.
Let me tell you which of the ads i’m referring to: The Ad. The only ad you seem to run with the only footage you seem to have. She’s in a dark room, she doesn’t know what’s happening and there’s something scary behind her that grabs her. I get it. Mocku-Docu-creature-Blair-Cloverfield-”i’m really scared” Project. I understand your product, what it does and how i can obtain it. You have earned your money today. Now, when was the last time you treated yourself to a long lunch? What’s that? You’re not hungry? Rats.
Let me just throw this idea out: What if I signed a waiver that guaranteed you that I knew what your movie was called and when it was opening? Would that absolve me of my obligation to think about your movie when doing work, in my car, relaxing, trying to compose a thought, etc?
Not biting? Ok…what if I promised to bring in two other people to sign the form, and then they promised to bring two in and so on and so on? Would that make the offer more attractive to you?
No, huh? OK, final offer: I get a tattoo of the name of your movie and 10/10/08 on the thumb and forefinger of my right hand, so that every time i shake hands with someone they are made aware that you have a movie that you would like us all to see. In exchange I get to live in a world that doesn’t revolve around the girl in the room talking to the camera and then getting yanked away from the camera. Deal? Let me know.
Respectfully,
Cecelia Script Reader, President, Consumers Against Faulty Eyewear*
*Bonus Reader Quiz! For those few of you reading this who aren’t part of the thousands-strong marketing team for Quarantine, this consumer group name was taken from a movie about summer fun. Can you name this move? The only prize as of right now is my respect, but if i can cut a deal with the Quarantine people i might be able to get you out of your ad watching responsibilities as well, so send in those answers!
Summer School.
The movie with Mark Harmon and the two Tom Savini wannabe’s? Love it.
Cecelia - I’m going through the same shit now…just, no tattoos.
oh my god. I’m sick of that quarantine poster. It’s everywhere and I’m SICK of it!!!
Wow - I consider myself lucky that I have not been bombarded with Quarantine marketing. But that could be because I live in Australia and it hasn’t reached me yet. Score one for targetted online marketing by geographic location.
On the other hand, over marketing can definitely create a backlash. an audience can definitely become tired if they are over-exposed before the content closes the circle.
Thirdly, a huge amount of hype then has to deliver - and this is tragically far too commonly botched. from a studio’s point of view, enough bums on seats is the goal - not a fantastic experience for the viewer. If we walk out of an over-hyped film in disappointment, the studio still has their box-office take.
But imagine if the product delivered on the promise? The you have a classic - a film that will also sell on DVD, that will spawn sequals and spin-offs, that will become a staple on cable and TV, that will crop up in magazine polls.
Sadly, because the marketing focus is on bums on seats and not quality, an over-marketed film such as Quarantine is usually an indication that it should be avoided. The marketers know that word of mouth won’t give them their return - they need everyone to go in the first weekend before word spreads.
point one: i feel that way about eagle eye. especially since that marketing campaign insisted on sponsoring shows and thus subjecting viewers to extended trailers for weeks (was it months? it sure felt like it) on end.
point two: sadly i got a hair cut the weekend quarantine opened and the shampoo boy replied to my query of weekend plans. “i hope i am going to see quarantine. i think it is out this weekend?”
point three: it is the above case of “in one ear out the other” public that makes us be bombarded but let’s face it, it is also a dead give away that something is going smell up the room BAD that those bankrolling can only prey you stand it line to see it opening night before the reviews and cooler talk tells you to stay far away.
Fredrok is the winner of my respect.