Drink the Bitter Kool-Aid and Join the Cynics!

Welcome to my new blog!  I’m very excited to have the opportunity to blog about all the things I scream to myself in my office. I originally wanted to title this blog “The Bitter Blogger,” because if you work in this business, someone has invariably told you to be weary of the bitter, cynical types that plague this town like locusts. But let’s be honest - it’s the bitter, angry, cynical types that keep this town running. And while it did take a few years, I have officially joined their cult. And don’t kid yourself - it might take you a little longer to drink the kool-aid – but you will become one of us.

I chose the classic character of Howard Beale from “Network” as my picture because I think his sentiment and message is felt throughout the entertainment industry, especially in the last couple years. There are days where if I could shout it from the rooftops, I would. But this is the digital age, so consider this blog my rooftop.

I looked to my friends and colleagues hoping that perhaps the cynical nature was just a myth, but I honestly can’t name one of my LA friends, especially those in the business for more than 4-5 years, who aren’t pretty pissed about something. And ya know why? Because despite how irreverent and liberal the rest of the world thinks we are, the movie business restrains people, especially development execs, from speaking our true thoughts. We can’t grab a writer and say “THIS SUCKS! HOW ARE YOU A WORKING WRITER?” or grab his agent and say “WHY THE HELL ARE YOU WASTING MY F’N TIME?” And we certainly can’t grab our bosses by their monogrammed lapels and scream “HOW DID SOMEONE GET SO FAR WITH SO LITTLE TASTE AND TALENT?”

And holding it in, much like an angry bowel movement, only causes things inside to back up. Years and years of being backed up and silenced about one’s real opinions and thoughts naturally makes anyone angry and a bit bitter. The cynical part comes in when we see the people who DO express their less-worthy opinions getting promoted and touted as brilliant.

So, consider this blog my therapy for being backed up all these years. Now, I’m not completely stupid or self-destructive, which is why I am choosing (for now) to keep this blog anonymous, however, what you can count on from me is honesty. No bullshit. I will give you all an honest look at the development process, how we find scripts, the spec market, writers, agents, managers, and the stupidity running rampant in this business. And I’m sure there will be some other general stuff that pisses me off that I will want to share too. And I hope you share your comments and questions with me. I’ll be happy to answer whatever questions you have the best I can.

Here’s your first kernel of truth. The other reason so many development execs are bitter is because most of us want (or wanted) to be writers. We came out here to write, but somehow something went horribly wrong and we found ourselves on the other side, now put in charge of changing, judging and developing other people’s projects because for some reason – whether it was lack of talent, lack of time or lack of motivation – we couldn’t finish our own.

In my own case, it was lack of motivation. I hate self-imposed deadlines and I just couldn’t stand looking at that blank page. I would clean my whole entire apartment and complete every other tiny miniscule project I could find before I could sit down and write. But luckily, I found development. And it turns out, I’m pretty good at it and I even enjoy it most of the time. But I never forget how hard it is to sit down and confront the blank page, which is why I try to be a friend to writers. Even if we’re bitter and cynical, we’re not all the enemy. However, this creative force inside of many of us is also the horribly frustrating part of being a development executive. Because 75% of the time, we think (or know) we could write the script better than the writer. Now, I have worked with studios but largely have worked at independent production companies which means we don’t always get the A-list writers’ scripts and we’re not the very first call a big agent makes when going out with a hot spec. But it also means we have to work even harder to find the good stuff, and therefore go through a great deal more shit (which in turn ratchets up the bitter quotient).

So, before this blog is officially too long, let me end by saying this: being bitter and cynical is a way of life in LA, and I look forward to sharing my lifestyle with all of you. I love saying things that piss people off, challenge or shock people. Why? Because life is short, and one’s life in this business is even shorter. So whether it’s calling out an agent for consistently sending out shitty material, or point out how an exec only got their job because of the tight shirts she wears, get ready for some fun. Don’t worry - it won’t all be gossip and superficial crap. I want this blog to help young execs and writers learn the development process and how to navigate through it. But you better believe it will be entertaining.

THE HOLLYWOOD DEVELOPMENT EXECUTIVE

Our Top secret Development Executive has worked at both independent production companies and studio based shingles where he has developed and packaged projects to take to market. He also works as a script consultant for numerous companies. He has so much juicy stuff to talk about, and promises to say what everyone else is afraid to, so there is no way he’s telling you his real name.